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Caption: Sophograph - 1889
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III! 0PH0GKAPH. highest honor ol his country. What an incentive such a life should be to us to make the most of ourselves and our opportunities, being sure that tiue worth will be found out and will receive its reward call the attention of our readers to the dude on Page 5, not on account of any particular personal beauty, but on account of the rarity of this species of the genus homo in this section of the country. Once on a time we read of this University as a "dude factory," and as this aroused our curios ity have watched faithfully and inquired diligently to find some product of said "factory." At our first inquiry we were directed to the machine shop ; but what was our disappointment to find only a dozen or so grimy looking sons of toil, clad in overalls and frocks, hard at work pounding sand. On our asking if there any dudes there we were politely requested to "get-ou-out," and not be insulting them. Again inquiring we were directed to the Veterinary's room. After a long search we found the Doctor and his class busily engaged in the difficult, though highly commendable work of cutting up a hog which had died from some unknown cause, and trying to determine the nature of the fatal disease. We scanned the boys closely, but there were no dudes there. Neither did we have any better luck in the Chemical Laboratory, for as we entered, such a terrible stench tell upon our nostrils—the like of which we never but once before experienced, at a certain sociable a year or more ayo—that we fled precipitately, being sure no dude could exist in such a place. The ( l.'s., in shirt-sleeves, were surveying the college yard, and when we approached one of them who was muttering to himself something about measuring within \-1,000 of an inch to the mile and asked him about dudes, he became so enraged that had not his professor seized him we should have probably been killed on th spot. When we looked into the Architectural room we saw only a cl s of hard looking fellows drawing as if their lives depended on it, and when we put u the oft repeated question, Any dudes here," a silent shake of the head was ur only answer. Across the hall in the Art room we found one "dudine but no dudes With weary steps we descended to the ba ment and entered th Natural History room. A class so closely engaged in < iraining a new kind Bacteria" that they did not notice us at all was the only ght that met our eyes. Feeling sure that the man who called the U of I. a dude facto as a consumate liar, we were about to leave, when w ore lirect 1 to the head quarters of the spe< d stud With languid steps we v ntering when our eye fell on an object of our weary search. Seal 1 their was . a 1 d live dude, with his eyes half closed and a sheepish exj m ^\\ h n w ing 1 vcly Ids j fcss W mentio l the otyect oui search, and aving obtained | I OUI dud ire tak< and kind reader, u present eve ec hat "dude fa< iv" man, tell him ) \ c don't it st sh«»w him 1 iuin down town, and had hi him t«> sou . and should you know he is not a liai. and it 1 1
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